Bring it!

Today is the day...

P90X!!! I'm going to give it a go. I'll be following the Classic rotation. Chest & Back and Ab Ripper today. (Yes, it's past midnight, so I can say today.)

Bring it!

I will mention that I'm not a happy camper at all. My P90X that arrived? Used. Every single disk had light scratching, the disk holder was broken, and the books were scuffed and used. My "coach" sent off a letter to Beach Body requesting a new copy for me. I haven't heard back yet. I asked if I should send this back and she said wait until I get the new one, and use it if I can. I've watched seven of the disks--everything I need for the first four weeks, and they all played. Not too cool--but I'm glad she's going to bat for me so I don't have to. My coach is a wonderful lady!

~~~~

I forgot to share a fun NSV. Last week when we were signing our life away for the new cell phones, I had to give the guy my license so he could run a credit check. So he was looking at my license, then he looked up at me. He had an odd expression. I said nothing. Then he was filling out yet another form and he asked if everything was correct on the license. I said, "Well, no, it's not." So what did he say to me? Not about my address, nooo....he said, "You don't look like you weigh this much."

What a saint. I could have kissed him on the spot.

My license says 250 pounds. I weighed around 210 at the time. I was tickled pink!

Now off to sleep so I can be rested for my grueling workout tomorrow. ;-)

NSVs and Other Stuff

NSV #1: I wore real shoes today. I had an old pair of tennis shoe-like bootish looking things that I used to wear a lot. I kept them hoping I'd fit into them again some day. The past couple years my feet have been so swollen I couldn't wear them. So for the first time in a couple years this morning, I put them on and wore them all day long. Gone are the days I wear my mules with no socks because I have to, but can now wear real shoes out and about. (I still love my mules, though.)

My tennies I wear to work out in are too big now and my feet slide around in them. I need new shoes. I've mentioned this before. I looked at several pair today but walked out of the store empty handed. Will look again.

NSV #2: This is a BIG one for me. Said shoes that I wore today became untied when we walked into Barnes and Noble. In the store, in front of Christmas crowds, I bent over and tied my shoes. Only someone morbidly obese can get the significance of that. I didn't have to throw a leg out to the side in order to bend over. I didn't look like a fool. I didn't have to prop my foot up on something. I BENT OVER AND TIED MY SHOE -- IN PUBLIC NO LESS. Yes, I'm shouting. This was one of my biggest goals!!!!

NSV #3: Last night I was getting ready for bed and was playing before and after in the mirror. You know, suck the stomach in for the after, let it all hang out for the before! lol The fact is, I can now suck my stomach in. I couldn't before. As I was doing this, my husband walked into the bedroom. He was amazed and congratulated me. He knew I couldn't suck it in before. It was pretty darned cool! I can really lose inches doing that! Too bad I can't walk around all day like that! I know for sure I'll be that way for real sometime next year!

My kiddo had two dental appointments today. He is healing up beautifully, no longer has to rinse every hour with salt water--a huge deal for him, and he had some special brace thing put on his braces around the surgery area. He's happy. When he's happy, I'm happy.

We had some time to kill between appointments and so we shopped a little and ate out at my favorite place, The Olive Garden. I'm glad it's an hour away, otherwise I'd be in trouble! Then we hit a couple thrift stores. For years and years, I have wanted an old-fashioned blow mold nativity set for the front yard. I'm a vintage freak and love those things. I've looked and looked always coming up empty handed.

Today, at one of the thrift stores, I spotted it--the complete set, including the three wise men and a camel. We raced to the back of the store and some #&*($ man beat me to it. He bought it all. Fair is fair, he was there first. All Christmas stuff was 50% off, and he got that set for under $30. I almost cried! Then I said to him his yard would look great and he had the nerve to tell me he didn't want it, he has a shop and will re-sell it. ARRRGGGHH!!!!!!! He did leave behind a 3-foot Santa without the light which I promptly snatched up for $4. Just have to find a light to fit it, and it's in great shape. So I didn't leave empty handed, but....I will always remember this day and always be a little ticked I didn't get there first! lol

Blow molds, by the way, are the (tacky?)plastic decorations with lights inside. I never knew the technical term of blow mold until I got my first Empire pumpkin this past Halloween.

My husband has taken vacation for THE REST OF THE YEAR. Oh my Lord! It's very difficult to do school with him here as the flow just doesn't, um, flow. Granted two weeks of this we had planned on being off for Christmas break, but we still have the rest of the week to get through. When I mentioned this, he informed me I wasn't making him feel welcome in his own home. Sorry! It's just that when he's here, I'm in relax mode. Or let's get this project done mode, and NOT school mode. Oy!

I'll have to make him some Snickerdoodles to make him feel welcome in his own home!

My Rebounder Arrived & a Cool NSV

FedEx arrived a few hours earlier than their normal schedule on my street. I was excited, as our Bellicon Rebounder arrived.

Oh my gosh, this is by far the best rebounder I have ever owned--and I've owned about four or five of them. Nice, soft bounce, absolutely no noise--it's heaven. It is the best bounce/feel I have ever experienced. Minimal shock to the body. My son and I tried it, then hubby did when he came home from lunch. We're all in love.

The thing that sucks when you get a rebounder is that you are only supposed to spend 2-5 minutes on it a day for the first week--with your feet on it, meaning, no jumping. Well, I did jump for about 30 seconds just to see what it was like. Wonderful! I need a new bra. lol It is going to be fantastic when I can start bouncing for real. The second week you're on it, you adjust your time up by 5-10 minutes and then you can bounce to your heart's content.

I am beyond thrilled with this thing. It's so quiet, I can run while the boys are watching TV. It's going to be an excellent addition to "Jo's Gym" which my husband has affectionately re-named our living room.

~~~

NSV News

This morning while I was getting dressed, I was standing in front of a mirror. I caught a glimpse of something very shocking. They weren't there yesterday, I can guarantee, but, I have two lines where my obliques are. I looked, changed positions, felt them, and looked again. Now I still have a very large stomach, but by golly, those definition lines are there as clear as day! I showed hubby when he got home. lol (No, I won't be sharing pictures here! lol)

Thank you, FIRM. I hate doing abs--but I've been making my best effort while doing those tapes. I can't do all the ab work by a long shot, but I do what I can and push for one or two more crunches usually. Wow, it's paying off. It makes me excited for when I lose more fat/weight--will I actually have a toned body? I think so! Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think that would happen. How cool is that!

~~~
One final note. I took a nap after supper last night and then couldn't sleep. I was up until 3. I got up at 7 as normal this morning, and I am really dragging. My son is about to finish up with the written work in school and just has some assigned reading to do. I am going to take a nap! Then when I get up, I'm going to do a FIRM tape. Then I'm going to stare at the rebounder and wish it were two weeks from now.

Oh, and to answer a question: School is going extremely well this year. I think it's our best year ever, due to the ADHD meds. My son is working very hard, scoring very well on his work, and learning. Next week we're going to start up with Rosetta Stone Spanish, our geography course which we haven't started yet because I couldn't decide which to do, and since we're getting done so much faster due to the meds, I think we're going to do a unit study on the human body. My son has expressed an interest in learning to lift weights, so I've got our book out and I'm devising a plan for him. We'll probably start that, too. He keeps asking about muscles, bones, physical fitness questions, so I think it's a great time to re-visit the human body study we did a few years back with much more depth.

Bless You, Wal-Mart

Tonight I fell asleep at 6 pm, awoke at 7:30. Hubby and son ate something, I was starved, so my son and I grabbed the grocery list and then went to Subway. My first pop since last weekend, and I absolutely enjoyed it. After we ate, we went to Wally World. (I did not buy pop at Wal-mart!)

I wanted to look at weights, and on our way over there I passed the "skinny people clothes" the territory that I dare not step foot in. I noticed a huge display of workout gear. I looked at my son, and said, "Let's go look for Susie." He loudly protested, "Mom, you're looking for you!!!" Then he got an earful. I told him how hard it was for me to step into the skinny people section, blah, blah, blah, and if I pretend I'm looking for someone else, I don't feel self conscious. I told him the size pants I was looking for: 18, and a 20 top. I said find me something.

And he did and I did. I ended up getting two pair of workout shorts size 16/18, one of which I tried on the second I got home and am still wearing even though it still has the tags in it. I am also wearing one of four new tops, size 20, short sleeves. REAL exercise clothes, the kind that wick sweat away, the cute, trendy, hip stuff. ON ME. The shirts are pretty colors. This girly-girl got pink, peach, light blue and heather gray--all my favorites!

Granted, I wouldn't be caught dead in public in the shirts, they're skin tight and show everything. The shorts? I would wear outside. I told my husband it will be cool to see more of me when I'm working out. lol

I am so psyched. Our Wal-mart never carried this stuff, I looked and looked. Now I feel real, less sloppy, and ready for my workout tomorrow. Of course a tad bit broke, but the shorts were $7 apiece as were the shirts. Can't go too wrong at those prices. They were on clearance. I'm wondering if I should go buy some smaller stuff while it's greatly reduce for this winter. Will pay bills tomorrow and see how much money I have.

It's the little things in life. I feel like I fit in a bit more, having real exercise clothes. lol I'll still wear my pajama bottoms, as I only got two pair of shorts, but I'm happy.

Finding exercise clothes at my local Wal-mart that I can wear? I count that as an NSV for sure!

Wednesday

My new order of The FIRM stuff arrived today. Sadly, I couldn't do it. "The pain" that I have had for years now was rearing its ugly head with a vengeance. It was so bad I was doubling over, crying out, and very fearful. This sucks. I need to make a doctor appointment and get it checked out again. Hopefully we'll be able to figure it out. Tonight it was the worst it has ever been. Ugh.

My husband suggested I go through my old prescription bottles and look for a pain killer. Ibuprofen doesn't touch the pain. I took a Vicodin left over from last summer's sinus infection. I don't think I ever need to fear becoming addicted to pain medications, as there is still half a bottle left. Anyway, the pain is mild now, and I'm a little bit stoned drunk. Funny, I don't drink or do drugs, but I'm feeling it.

School today was great. My son's ADD meds are working wonderfully! He's doing school in much less time and I don't have to sit next to him to help him with his focus. I'm sure maturity has something to do with it as well, but there is a huge night and day difference from last year. This is such a huge relief to me. It was a difficult decision to start ADD meds. He has neurological issues, epilepsy, ADD, etc. We have coped and tried techniques to help with focus, but it got worse. Now? His confidence is soaring, his focus is clear. What a huge blessing.

We have unintentionally gone pop free. Pop is what I call soda, soda pop, Coke, Diet Coke, whatever you call it. Coke Zero and Diet Sierra Mist are my favorites. Hubby favors Diet Coke. Sunday we were out, and when I ran to the store for milk, I didn't pick any up. We're out of milk again, so hubs is going to run to the store after some show he's watching, and he said he's not buying pop. It's amazing how much more water I drink. I only had one pop a day, but I bet I've consumed double-triple the amount in water. That will save us a lot of money.

I'm not giving up pop forever, though. I enjoy a fountain pop every now and again. Yet, this is one big step toward better health in not drinking it every day. I'm surprised my husband is on the band wagon, too. He drinks more than I do. Funny, my son hates pop. Always has. He always orders milk or water at restaurants, and he always gets complimented for doing so. lol He just doesn't like pop.

I did not plan on doing this, it just happened. Perhaps my mind is stronger than I give it credit for: leaning in the better direction, even when I don't plan it! Definitely a NSV!

I'm going to bed. I'm still feeling the pain, and I'm loopy, so I'm just going to call it a night.

Can't Sleep

Tomorrow we start school, and here I am, wide awake. I'm so not ready for school, the routine, the lack of freedom--yet I'm very ready for it at the same time.

Every year the first year of school it has been our tradition to go to Hardee's drive through for biscuits and gravy for my son and a ham, egg and cheese biscuit for me. Well, Hardee's closed. We now have Arby's, and last year we drove through Arby's for DS and McDonald's for me. I always order 2 Egg McMuffin combos. I've been debating if I want to spare the fat and points for such a breakfast tomorrow. I don't think I do. My son really wants to continue his tradition, and I will accommodate him.

This morning I did one of my The Firm exercise DVDs. I did Maximum Body Sculpting with Tracie Long. It's an older tape. I like their older tapes better than the current versions. I did not use weights, I used my old step bench which is only a few inches high, and I took it very easy. I didn't want to injure myself. That all said, I was simply amazed--I poured sweat. I couldn't figure it out because it wasn't that difficult. I really enjoyed it. I mean really, really enjoyed it. I enjoyed it so much that I spent too much time online previewing The Firm videos and bought myself some more.

Their whole premise is you do cardio, sculpt, and a combo of cardio/sculpt in rotations. There are lists on the net floating around telling you which is which. I don't like their cardo tapes, so I didn't buy any. I have my beloved Richard Simmons tapes plus I won Ang's random pick in her summer challenge, so I'll soon have a Leslie Sansone video! How cool is that! (I also won a Hungry monster, a pair of Laura Silverman earrings and the Biggest Loser cookbook. I have picked that book up at Wal-mart many times to buy it, put it back down because I'm a cheapo. I was very happy this morning, thanks so much, Ang, and thanks random generator. lol)

So I bought a couple of the older Firm cardio/sculpt DVDs and another sculpt tape. I like their older stuff because it's not so hyper, it uses steps -- fanny lifters or transfirmers. I bought a transfirmer also. It's like a step, only it can go up to 14 inches high. It reminds me of a younger me--because the tapes are old, if that makes any sense.

I did notice something very interesting. I watched the three DVDs I have already purchased, and I've done two of them. They use the skinny, perfectly in shape men and women. This used to be off putting to me and one reason I liked Richard Simmons so much, as he uses all sizes of people. I've changed. I actually enjoyed looking at the beautiful bodies. It actually gave me great hope and inspiration. Could I be like that? Well, not likely as I don't plan on losing that much weight, but could I look really firm and fit at whatever goal weight I settle on? This was an amazing moment for me, because I had never thought that far ahead. It has never been what I would look like, it's always been fear of diabetes, getting my health in check.

I now have a desire to tone, to build my body, to be strong. After all the whining that I've done on this blog about resistance training, I now have a tool--a few of them--that I enjoy and will give me the strength training I've been so lacking. The old tapes are more girly-girl--it's a beautiful setting, the women have grace and poise, and due to the age, they're wearing pretty colors. lol It's just so ME.

Perhaps over time this will rev my metabolism a bit, too. I've lost an average of 1.2 pounds per week, according to my Weight Watchers report, since starting this journey. I'm thrilled, but I've also seen people start after me and are way ahead of me in weight loss. I'm thrilled for them. I didn't do all the work necessary to get there, they did. Plus, this is my own personal journey, and while I notice those things, I worry more about my own journey.

This journey is full of amazing discoveries. With each step, things get better. I am really excited about bringing exercise back into my life, having some variety. I've done Richard Simmons off and on for over 20 years--it's time to change things up a bit.

I wonder if I'll see "visible improvement after 10 workouts" like The Firm claims. I have taken my measurements, so we shall see.

Well, off to bed. Homeschool mom must be well rested for our big day tomorrow.

I Bought a Girdle

Yesterday when I was reading blogs, I laughed out loud when I read Tena's blog. She wrote a post titled It's Still a Girdle. Amen sister, call it what it is!

I bought myself one pair of pants and four new tops along with my pajama bottoms. The shirts were all size 18/20. Gee, the last time I was in that size range, I don't remember clothing sizes being slashed like that. I was thrilled to buy a top with the number 18 on it. My pants were size 20.

The only problem was that I could not button the last button--the part around my spare tire. I didn't want to buy bigger-sized shirts as I know I'm shrinking, so I bought them all anyway.

When we walked into JCPenney, I headed for the lingerie section. I carefully scouted out a clerk that was older and more my size. The cute skinny clerk came up to me and asked if she could help me as I was making a bee-line to the clerk I wanted, so I said thanks, I'm just looking. It wasn't a lie because I was just looking for a clerk I'd feel comfortable with.

I then went up to the "like me" clerk and she was very friendly and helpful. I explained I was in the process of losing weight, that I had just bought four shirts but couldn't button the last button--or could button it, but was afraid it would pop. I was about to ask for the "girdle" section when she beat me to it. She said, "You need a cincher."

She took me to the cinchers. Oh my. I had no idea what a cincher was. I looked at the thing, with a million hooks like bra hooks, and thought: NO WAY. The largest size she had was a 2X. I knew that wouldn't work, as that area is bigger and out of proportion to the rest of me. I was right, it did not work. I also asked her about Spanx, as I've read a lot about them.

JCPenney's carries Flexees, which are like Spanx. She handed me an XL, and I asked if she had a 2X. She did. I tried both. I could wear the XL, but it was so tight I feared I wouldn't be able to breathe and worse, I feared I would split the seams on the thing. The 2X was snug and believe it or not, it actually felt good on me.

I hope that JCPenney's did not have security people watching me try on clothes. I would have had them rolling with laughter. When I had the 2X Flexees on, I couldn't see that it cinched me in. I would focus on my gut, line it up with the crack in the door in my line of sight, then I'd pull it down fast so I could see a difference. I did it about 10 times. Kind of like a before/after of someone sucking their gut in. Even I was laughing at myself. I wasn't sure, couldn't see a difference, but I bought it anyway.

So as Tena stated, call it what you will: Spanx, supportive undergarment, whatever, it's still a flippin' girdle. Thankfully it's not the rubbery, weird smelling version that my skinny mother wore in the late 60s.

When we got home, I tried on all my clothes for hubby. The first thing I did was put on my Flexees, then my pants, and then the shirts. Guess what? It worked! It cinched me just enough to get that last button buttoned.

I debated posting this. Who in their right mind wants to admit they bought a girdle? The thing is, I get so much help reading others' blogs, that maybe someone else out there has the same last-button problem that I did. The garment actually felt good. Who woulda thunk it?

~~~

In that department, I also had a NSV. As I was walking into the changing room to try these things on, an older clerk, in front of customers!!!, said, "Oh, you're trying on our torture devices." I was not pleased that she did that. It was embarrassing enough that I was doing it, but I didn't need it announced. I had folded the things up to try to get in there discretely. So I turned the situation around.

I turned to her and said, "Yes, I am. You see, I have lost almost 45 pounds and I bought some new clothes today. I fit into a size 18/20 but my tummy isn't catching up with the rest of my body and I couldn't button the bottom button. So instead of buying clothing too big for me, and knowing I am going to continue to lose weight, I thought I might try these Spanx."

How's that for bringing a little glory to myself? I could have fumed, turned beet red, and sulked. I could have said nothing. Instead, I celebrated my victory. The clerk got very excited! She congratulated me. I noticed the customers she was helping smiled. (Two middle-aged women like me, but thinner.) She looked me up and down and then said: I want to know how you're doing it, because you are firm! You look good. I smiled, said Weight Watchers, and went into the dressing room.

She may have been placating me, I don't know. My husband told me that I do look pretty firm--more so than I did at my highest. Instead of getting upset--well, it did upset me that she said that out loud--I handled the situation. Six months ago that would have had me running down the mall to find the nearest cinnamon roll I could find. Monday, I was assertive and stood up for myself, and did it in a nice manner.

The Fair Fair (Two NSVs)

One half of our fair from the midway. Our fair gets smaller and smaller each year. We've decided that next year we won't go. We used to enter things in the fair, we've always gone, but year after year it dwindles to the point that there's very little offered. It's very sad. Every family who opts not to go in the future perpetuates the shrinkage, but it's expensive and I don't think it's worth the money anymore.

Here's a photo of my son on the Ferris Wheel. I had two startling realizations when I rode this with my boys.

First, as we were getting on, I whispered in my son's ear, "Sit on dad's side to balance the weight." So he did. The funny thing about that? My stinking thinking hasn't caught up to my weight reality. Right now my husband and I weigh the same amount. There's no balancing needed, aside from my 10-pound purse. (Or whatever it weighs.) Old thoughts and habits die hard.

Secondly, I need to admit I don't like fair rides. I find them anxiety producing. I don't like the Ferris Wheel. I usually squeeze my eyes shut, holding on to the bar in the middle. As if that's going to help if something were to happen! Last night I just got on, sat, chatted, pulled out my camera and took some shots and enjoyed. Halfway through the ride I interrupted and shouted: "I'm not nervous!" lol And I wasn't. And I enjoyed the ride.

Huh, me? How did that happen? I'm pretty happy about that.

Now to work on balancing my thinking. I weigh the same as my husband. !!! How long has it been since I've been able to say that? And the great thing? I will soon weigh less. That's how it's supposed to be.

I love this kid more than anything. Here he is, on top of the world.

Driver's Licenses...

Okay, fess up, how many have an accurate weight listed on their driver's license?

I don't!

I had a major NSV and didn't even know it. I pulled my license out of my wallet when we went to the lake today, as I didn't want to take my purse. I've been sitting here looking at it when I had a Homer d'oh moment.

I renewed last year. I wanted to be honest, so I chose 250 as my weight on my license. Ha! I knew I was around 260ish, give a few.

I am now UNDER my weight listed on my driver's license.

How cool is that!