My Mind is TIRED

I'm tired of thinking, tired of deciphering, tired of trying to figure out why my body is holding on so darned tight to the weight. I'm tired of working out hard and having great calorie burns, great deficits daily, and my body holding on to the weight.

I started doing more research--that's all I ever seem to do. I've read The American Heart Association's Website dietary recommendations, the Kidney Organization's, The American Cancer Society's. I've read about metabolic syndrome, insulin resistance, and kidney stone prevention.

My mind is SPINNING.

Today I was in a big city with a real book store. I went to the diet section and decided to look for some inspiration. I laughed out loud standing there in that section. You name it, there's a diet. Book after book after book.

The bottom line is this: eat a plant-based diet, healthy fats (olive oil, olive oil and more olive oil!), lean meats, complex carbs--whole grain only, eliminate processed foods, drink plenty of water, and consume fewer calories than you expend.

If only it were that simple. I think, though, that it is that simple. There are some things I could do to better my dietary intake. I've started consuming a tablespoon of olive oil daily, for starters. I need to dump the rest of the processed garbage that I eat. I don't eat a lot of it, but enough that I think it makes a difference.

It's a lot more work to eat this way. More kitchen time. Have I mentioned I'm kitchen challenged? I get into that "I have to further give up" mentality, too. Stinking thinking.

I used to believe that you could eat whatever you wanted as long as you were in your calorie range and be okay. That's how I started out and it worked. I knew deep in my heart, though, that wasn't true and I very slowly started making changes. The thing is, that needs to be constant--one cannot quit tweaking their diet. So time to tweak some more.

I'm just so very tired of trying to figure everything out. It's tough balancing a kidney stone diet which eliminates some very healthy foods, plant-based foods! (Beans, spinach, soy, etc.) Yet I have to do it, I have to figure it out.

Working out is something a love and NOT a problem for me at all. However, I even have room to grow here as well. Interval training (HIIT) has been proven to be very effective in raising HDL. I need to raise my HDL. I don't do a lot of interval training--in fact, I haven't done an interval workout in a long time. I tend to prefer steady state cardio. So I can tweak there as well. Cathe to the rescue.

I had wanted to do The FIRM's 90-Day Rotation. At this point, though, after careful consideration, I think I'll finish out the week and stop the rotation and add in some interval and circuit work. Cathe has had a fantastic sale and I just ordered some more of her DVDs which arrived today. They're tough, but I think at this point I need to challenge myself some more.

Yesterday I had a meltdown. I cried. I just don't understand how it works for some people so perfectly, and others struggle. My body chemistry is messed up. It's like I have to work four times as hard to get anywhere. I cried and whined to my husband. I think he thought I was giving up, because he said, "But Jo, think, you've lost 80 pounds, you don't want to mess that up." He didn't get my complaints. I'm just in a rather bad mood over all this. I'm never giving up, even though I throw out, "Forget this, why bother, or, well, worse." Just because I'm whining doesn't mean I'm throwing in the towel. Far from it.

It stinks, though. Why does it have to be so hard? Two steps forward, one step back...that's just the way it goes for me.

Marching forward, fight on, I'll get there. Maybe it was bad luck to rename my blog The Tortoise. S~l~o~w. However, the tortoise did win the race.

Screeching Halt

Just was online reading our local newspaper. It seems DH's company is laying off all but 40 employees. Hubby forgot to mention this to me. Fortunately for us, DH should be safe. However, I can't imagine they'll keep the company open here when there is no production here--it's completely illogical. Illogical to me, that is.

Guess it's time to get the house market ready. Good luck with that.

Just what I need, one more huge worry on top of my health issues and everything else. If I drank, I'd probably get drunk right now. I don't drink, so will have to face it head on.

Holy crap. This economy is so bad and I feel so bad for the families who are losing their jobs. We're a small town and they're not going to find jobs like they have now.

What is in store for us, personally! It's time to go on major frugal mode, I guess. Not that I'm a big spender, but still.

Oy.

What happened? I don't get it!

So last night I did an all-time favorite workout, The Firm's Cardio Step Mix. This was the first workout that I burned over 500 calories with. Last night? I burned 346. The workout didn't feel difficult to me--I mean it's not easy, but I didn't have an "oh-my-God, can I make it?" feeling through at all. In fact, last night I thought, "Wow, at the end already?"

Okay, so this morning I just did The Firm's Express Cardio. This is a 30-minute workout that usually produces a high calorie burn--always over 200. Calorie burn this morning? 131.

So what happened? Did I go to bed one night and the next morning wake up twice as fit as I was before? Am I going to have to work that much harder for a decent calorie burn from now on? Am I going to have to forgo my favorite workouts (Firms) while in the weight-loss process so I can get the calorie burns I need?

I mean this is a good thing--fitness improving. Actually, it's great. That's what I want. But I'm SHOCKED. My heartrate last night and this morning did not raise as high as when I do, say, my new Christi Taylor workout. I had a hard time getting my heart rate up.

I'm in disbelief. I'm going to have to sit down and study my videos, figure out how I can get a better calorie burn and come up with a game plan. (I'm not a runner, have no desire to run, so that's just not an option.)

So it's great, but it sucks, too, because I'm a creature of habit and want what I want when I want it, and that's just not going to work now.

Ding-Dong

My doorbell rang at 8:05. I had overslept, was just pouring a cup of coffee--hadn't showered, dressed or brushed my teeth yet. (ugh!) It was the mail man with my package in hand. He apologized right and left, told me it was misplaced, handed it over, apologized again. He was very nice.

I wish the guy who answered the phone had been nice--I think I was more upset by the rudeness of the guy on the phone than the actual package being lost.

All is well now.

Whew!

I Could Cry

Seriously, I don't know whether to be mad or to cry.

Today I was scheduled for a delivery from the USPS. It included a couple of DVDs, one of which was my give away. Also included was a free T-shirt.

I checked the tracker this morning and it said out for delivery.

We left to run errands and arrived home at 4:30. Upon arrival, I went to the mailbox as I knew the small package would be there.

It was not.

Pulled into the garage, got out, and lo and behold, NO package.

Called the post office and the man was a total jerk. It was delivered. You're out of luck, it was delivered.

Why the hell do I need to find my mail? He told me to check my garage, my mail box and the front door. I told him I did twice. He said it has been delivered, end of story.

I told him HE needed to ask the carrier WHERE he left the package so I can find it.

A person shouldn't have to play Easter egg hunt to find their blipping mail.

I asked what happens if it doesn't show up? His answer? That's your problem, we delivered it. Call the person who sent it to you. I did email the vendor.

I think I'm sh*t out of luck unless it was delivered to a neighbor. We have jerks for neighbors, but I doubt any of them would be dishonest and to put the package out.

Jo against the Post Office--I don't think I'll win this battle.

Give me UPS from here on out!

What would you all do? It's the Post Office's word against mine. I'd swear on a bible there is NO package here. I think I'm screwed.

I won't replace what I bought for myself, if it comes down to that, but I will replace my give away.

grrrrr

A Sick Feeling

Today has just been one of those days.

I decided to get busy with the homeschool planning, made up my forms and then emailed them to the old computer that is hooked up to the printer. I went downstairs, got the documents, turned on the printer and ... service error. Looked up the service error and wanted to cry.

Yes, my old HP LaserJet 4Plus that I bought new for a lot of money in 1995 has died. Oh, has he been a good friend to me. In my court reporting days, which is why I bought him, he printed hundreds of thousands of pages. In my "retirement" years, he has printed Cub Scout stuff, personal papers, genealogy, and most importantly, all our homeschool stuff.

A homeschooler simply cannot live without a printer. A good printer.

We have had a few inkjet printers over the years. They always die. I think we've had five or six in the last ten years. I always just printed without color on the LaserJet. The inkjet printers were so expensive to print with, the LaserJet was pennies.

So I must bite the bullet and get a new printer. Looking at Newegg is making my head spin. I want duplexing, I want wireless, I want color. Options are few. I sure didn't want to be spending any more money. Yet, I don't want to go frugal and regret it later. We each have a computer now, and the wireless, while not necessary, it's really at the top of our want list.

What with the car repair, the new printer, the appointment later this week finding out what the braces will cost...I just get a sick feeling in my gut. What's more, our fridge is making a lot of bad noises. Hubby never heard them, and maybe he thought I was crazy, but today at lunch he heard it and the look on his face made my stomach churn. It ain't pretty.

I just bought a new washer not long ago as the old one died, but I was able to pay cash. It is very hard to live without a credit card. I should have our car repair paid off this month, but darn it all, now here's another big bill for a printer. We do enough printing, that it really wouldn't pay to go cheap. Laser costs less to operate, it doesn't smear, and it's faster. Printing one of the workbooks from Rosetta Stone Spanish alone would eat up a inkjet cartridge--at least that's our experience, and I have two to print because I have to learn the Spanish, too.

UGH

The good news is that as my stress level rose, I did not have a panic attack, just a sick feeling. Also, I did not turn to food. Food isn't going to make me feel one bit better. I know if I were to walk to the fridge or cupboard and eat, it would indeed make me feel much worse. So I think I've made great strides in that area. In times gone by, I would be eating cookies now, and lots of 'em.

I shouldn't complain. Especially in these times, with people losing jobs, with the economy in the sh*thole like it is. We are very fortunate. I do count my blessings. We're healthy, we're safe. That doesn't mean that I can't get that sick feeling when I need to spend money, though. And I'm frustrated because I wanted to get school planned *now* and be done with it.

sigh

Tough Love

Has anyone noticed that I have NOT filled in a single day on my exercise calender for the entire month of June?

Someone, everyone, PLEASE...call me on it.

I need some tough love here.

I sat around and moped, doing nothing today.

I need a drill sargeant. I need someone to give me a kick in the pants to make me go.

Lecture me, remind me why I exercise, make me feel guilty, motivate me...

I can't do this alone.

There's NO reason why I did not exercise yesterday or today. Not one.

grrrrr

Blog Help

Anyone who knows anything (which is way more than I know) about blog problems, could you help me out?

I have had a couple people let me know that they can't get on my blog. Others can get on but can't leave comments.

I know that the web ring that I am on, I keep getting kicked out because the new owner can't always get on my blog.

I am clueless. I haven't added anything new for a long time except for the link to Ang's summer challenge. Everything else is the same as it has been for weeks.

I don't have password protection on my comments, yet I still have people that can't comment.

Any computer literates out there that can help me out? I am clueless as to what the problem is. I have no problem ever with the blog loading!

3dognight @ midco . net

Thank you in advance!

Anxiety

This is my 200th post. Sheesh, I'm yacky!

Anxiety hit me this morning. I was looking for the papers I wanted (IQ test and Educational Psychologist recommendations) and I came across letters from my son's first kindergarten teacher. It made my heart race, it made me angry and I just worked myself into a frenzy. She was an awful teacher. She used to write in a notebook every day and send it home in my son's backpack. He whined today, he peeled a crayon today an then broke it in half, he didn't listen during story time instead he picked rocks out of his shoes. Stuff like that...and he was 5 at the time, all normal 5-year-old behaviors. He was never a whiner, ever. (Well, he does now, but not when young.) He also was not a destructive child, and never once broke a crayon at home. He never broke any toys. He was an intent listener, although he fidgeted...to this day he does the same. She insisted he wasn't listening, but I asked her to have him re-tell the story the next day and she reluctantly relayed that he did. Halfway through the year my son was depressed and we demanded he be put into a different classroom. The principal didn't bat an eyelash, he just did it. And things got better for awhile. (And I will add his second K teacher, and 1st and 2nd great teachers were wonderful.)

That just set me off. I decided I don't need to take his IQ and the report, because they are so old. I can relay the information. I've been his teacher since 3rd grade, so I'm the one now with the current information that needs to be relayed.

About the time my husband was due for lunch, I started shaking bad. It's the anxiety. I shake on the inside and out, if that makes any sense. It came on fast and furious. I am nervous about discussing this tomorrow. I have never met this doctor, although she comes highly recommended from friends.

I broke down and took a Xanax.

Then I started working on my son's camp forms, which take two hours to fill out. And now here I sit ready to sleep due to the Xanax.

My son has worked on his math and science today and he'll do his practice tests later. I am going to take a nap because my body needs it. I am glad I have a well-stocked freezer, as I was able to pull a decent dinner option to thaw.

So I'll hit the store tonight. My list is done, I just need to go.

I hate this anxiety. I hate that I am not strong enough to overcome it on my own. It makes me feel weak. I do love the fact that I have a medication that can help me, though. I know how hard it must be on my body when I am having the shakes. I understand why I have the anxiety today. I just don't understand why I can't roll with the punches. I know logically it is stressful, but why I can't just accept that without these problems is beyond me.

I usually try to sit and do meditations before popping a pill. Sometimes it works, but today it didn't work.

Well, I'm on plan, have my dinner thawing so no room for failure today. I did not work out today, because I plan to walk the dog tonight. I did not exercise yesterday and wonder if that made a difference on the anxiety today. Exercising is such a good release of tension, releases the endorphins, and I wonder if that was a mistake. My calf muscles were hurting, so I thought I should rest. (That and I was in a very bad mood. lol)

Onward!

Boring Afternoon, But 2 Great NSVs

Today was my day to volunteer at the library book sale. I dreaded it, and my dread was correct. It was as boring as watching paint dry. It could have been fun but the gal who volunteered with me was one of those women who talk incessantly about themselves, leaving no room for an actual conversation.

Yawn.

She said "shit" many times in front of patrons, "Jesus" and "bitch" were used, too. Have some class, lady. (I say those things in the privacy of my home or with certain people, but I would never do that in public.)

Then the president of our group showed up. I tried to engage him in pleasant conversation. Every time we started talking, she'd interrupt and start blabbing on. I just tuned her out. So did he. She was going on and on about something and in mid-sentence, the man turned and walked away. That made me smile on the inside (because I'm evil.)

I was also very saddened to learn that a good portion of donations are put into recycle piles. We discovered the pile, and there must have been a couple thousand books. I was shocked because there were books I would have bought if my son were younger. There were some of my donations as well. I donated a few sets, textbooks, teachers manuals and workbooks that we didn't use. The textbooks were on the shelves, but the teacher manuals and workbooks were in the recycle. My donations were mint condition, too.

There was an entire box of Zane Grey books, in mint condition.

I didn't understand the logic: put the clean books out and if they don't sell, then put them in the recycling. I will be rethinking what I donate in the future.

I was also dumbfounded to learn that the money from these sales does not buy books like one would assume. The money buys the social things for our library: A coffee bar, a Wii and Wii games. My son has gone to three of the Wii parties for teens, and at two of them, he was the only one to show up.

They need some good leadership. Personally, I'd rather the money go for books!

There's my rant for the day. Now for the NSVs:

It was cold and windy today, but expected to be in the 60s. I wanted to wear a short sleeve shirt, but I didn't have a spring coat that fit well. I have a few that are too tight and too short.

WRONG. I put my favorite blue coat on, expecting to look like a sausage stuffed into its casing, when lo and behold, the coat was long, the sleeves went to my knuckles, and I could zip it up plus put something under if need be. lol

This NSV just shocked me, because I wasn't thinking about weight or fit or anything, just dreading wearing the too-small coat. Wow, what a pleasant surprise.

~~~

One of the volunteers this morning brought in two plates of brownies. Great big, beautiful chocolate brownies. They smelled divine. Another plate of cranberry and orange brownies. They didn't tempt me at all. lol I sat there with the brownies within my reach the entire afternoon and didn't even want one. I did enjoy the smell, but I just had no desire to eat one.

So a weird afternoon. I'm glad I volunteered, it's nice to be helpful. I prefer to be a recluse and not have to deal with self-absorbed yackers, but I had some pleasant moments with patrons. I got out of the house, which is always good. I didn't eat a brownie and my coat was too big.

Not bad at all!

Off Days

Ever have a day where you just feel off?

Yesterday was my day. I was just annoyed with everything, yesterday. Until dinner, that is.

I'm just about to go exercise, and I decided since I was being snitty yesterday, that I would do Dance Your Pants Off again. I won't woo with them, because I'm a quiet person and don't woo--but I do woo-hoo on comments!--and I'll enjoy the routine. Because it is good.

So my lesson learned is this: Don't do anything other than the Sweatin' 1-4 on days that I'm just annoyed. The other days I'm good. lol

The other lesson learned is this: Yesterday I was annoyed at MYSELF and projecting it on to everything else.

All day, until dinner. I was annoyed that I volunteered to help at the book sale at the library Saturday afternoon, because I'd rather not. I was annoyed that I am not doing my housework like I used to. I've gone from an immaculate home to a clean-but-messy-at-the- moment home. (Well, actually it needs its weekly cleaning, but...) I'm annoyed that my wound is still weeping. I'm annoyed that only Flex Band-Aids stick without adding medical tape, and I'm out of those because I was too lazy to go to the store. I'm annoyed that I cannot multi-task. I'm annoyed at myself for getting so unhealthy.

So I had my pouty, snitty day yesterday. Today I have taken action to give myself an attitude adjustment. I've been cleaning, I've been getting some things done that needed done. We're about done with school for the day. So it's better.

I'm not annoyed anymore.

Woo Woo

I just finished working out. I did Richard Simmons' Dance Your Pants Off today.

I didn't like it.

I remember now why I never did the tape on a regular basis.

It's not the routine, I love the routine. It's not the music, I love the music. It's not the set, it's a great set.

It's the wooing. Wooo. Wooo. Wooo. The exercisers in the video are always wooing. Loudly.

It drives me crazy.

I know why they woo, it's because they're working out and having fun. I know it's in the tape because it adds an energy, an element of fun. I get that.

To me, though, this is MY time. I want to escape into the music and only hear what Richard has to say--instruction wise. I don't want woos. I love to watch the people. I think it's inspirational. I just don't want to hear them.

How selfish of me, eh?

I have a child who makes a lot of noise. A lot. At times I can't take his weird little noises he makes just for the fun of it, and I ask him politely to stop. He does, for 30 seconds, then forgets and makes weird noises. Kids do that. He's a teenager, and I guess teenagers do that, too.

I have three dogs. That's a lot of noise.

We live next to senior citizens who have a poodle who walks on water--at least in their eyes. The dog barks all day long, every day. Yip yip yip yip yip. We can hear the dog barking in our house with the windows closed--even when he's in his house with the windows closed. I have lost all enjoyment of my back yard due to their dog, because I cannot stand the noise. The minute I step outside, the dog is in the window barking at me. That dog makes 90% more noise than all three of ours do put together. It makes more noise than all the dogs on the street.

They never tell him no.

I just don't do noise. I have too much of it in my life.

So I don't want woos. I just want to completely escape into the music. I want to watch with my eyes, sing along in my head, but I just don't want the woos.

I guess I'll stick to the Sweatin' to the Oldies series because I can escape when I'm doing that.

A Little Rant

I am trying to be so focused on positive, but when something bugs me I think it's good to get it off my chest. So I'm going to have a little rant.

I've mentioned my best friend before. She is a gal who loves the Atkins/Low-Carb style, but never loses any weight. She also believes every person should eat whole-fat foods: whole milk, yogurt, butter, etc. She uses all the bad oils in her cooking. She doesn't believe in the concept of calories.

That's all fine for her, it's her life, and she has to do what fits her life. The preaching gets on my nerves, though.

So last night she was talking about being in a medical facility cafeteria visiting someone. She went to get lunch and was very upset that they only had low-fat yogurt, because it's so unhealthy. She ranted about medical facilities should know better than to serve anything low fat. According to her, they (whomever they is) have proved that low-fat diets don't work. Cough, cough, ahem.

I just ignore this stuff and try to change the subject.

We were talking about medial issues and she made a comment about my anxiety. Remember those pills they gave you last year that you thought you needed? The pills for your anxiety? You've sure proven them wrong, haven't you? You don't need those, no one does.

My mouth hung open. I told her I had just taken one the other night. She ignored me and went on and on about anxiety being over diagnosed and that it was all in my head.

Oy.

~~~~

Just sharing this helps me. It was amazing she made the anxiety comments. She knows full well I still take Xanax. Granted, I don't take them often, but since my massive panic attack, I've had monthly mild panic attacks and I DO take the pills.

My frustration is that I just cannot talk about anything health related with her at all and that she doesn't LISTEN to me. While I will never convince her that saturated fat is bad, I don't try anymore. She's certainly entitled to her own opinion. I just find the whole thing perplexing.

~~~~

This person is related to me, but not a sibling. We do not live in the same town, but talk on the weekly. I haven't gone to see her for awhile because the last time we were together, we had a blast, but she nitpicked about the fact that I drank a lot of water. I couldn't take a sip without being lectured. It was annoying as hell. Anything relating to health, food intake--it just can't be discussed with her. For the record, I had a water in the morning and one in the afternoon--not a lot by any means. It was June and hot!

~~~~

Everyone has quirks, and this is hers. I hope that I am not that way with her, but I tend to have very good manners and mind my mouth. I might think something, but I never say it because it's unnecessary and frankly rude.

There, rant over. Just needed to get it off my chest.

Now I'll shout:

SATURATED FAT IS BAD FOR OUR BODIES!!! lol

Guesswork

Last September, we bought a side of beef. Everyone told us how we would love it, how lovely it would be to have meat in the freezer, and how much better the quality was than grocery store beef.

Wrong, right, wrong.

We got some great cuts of beef that we wouldn't normally buy. That part was nice. The ground beef I'm guessing is about 70% beef 30% garbage. It's disgusting. The roasts are tiny and half fat. I cannot believe the amount of fat that has been left on these roasts. We are a small family of three, and one roast barely feeds us with no leftovers. We're not being gluttons, either.

I will be so thrilled to eat this up. When it's cleaned out, I'm going to start stocking up on sales. I have not noticed any difference in taste or quality--in fact, I think the quality of the beef from the store is better.

So tonight we had a roast. It was marked beef roast. I had five ounces of beef, after cutting all the fat off. When I went to Weight Watchers Online, I was met with varying degrees of points. I have no idea what kind of roast it was. How do you count points when you don't know exactly what it is you are eating?

I ended up choosing halfway between the lowest and highest point. I counted my 5 ounces as 8 points. I have no idea if I'm close or not.

The hamburger? It sits in the freezer. It's just so full of fat, that even when I wasn't on Weight Watchers, I hated it. I am still buying 93% hamburger from the grocery store. I don't know what to do with all this hamburger. I should boil some of it to make crumbles. I still don't know how to count it as I don't know the content.

That was a costly mistake. $750. We were lucky, it was a small side. I will continue to guess at points and hope I'm close.

In the future, I'll be a smarter consumer--like I used to be. I'll be buying my 93% ground beef and my lean cuts of beef. I'll stock up on sales, and we'll be much better off. Perhaps the money I save doing that will enable me to buy hubby some of the cuts he really enjoyed: T-bones, ribs, etc. Those aren't my cup of tea, but he likes them.

Clarification...

You know, my rant wasn't written very well.

In real life, I am a very open-minded person. I really try to live by the motto live and let live. My rant didn't come across that way.

My big beef with my friend, which I didn't write, was that she lectures me relentlessly about her ideas. She argues even when I change the subject. She just won't let it drop because she must be right.

I do find it ironic that she's overweight and hasn't lost an ounce, even though she lives by her beliefs and lectures me on mine and tells me relentlessly that my thinking is faulty. I do not really share my beliefs about food with her anymore because it's pointless.

That all said, there are many, many diets out there. The reason there are so many is because people are different. What clicks with one may not click with another. As I said, my hubby did the low-carb thing and took off a few extra pounds. He loved it. Not for me.

I chose Weight Watchers because it works for me, I won't feel deprived, and because I can custom-tailor it to be healthy for me. I could very well have counted calories, but this is easier to me.

My big gripe is just being lectured. She can have the freedom to choose what she believes, but why can she not afford me that same opportunity. That's the bottom line.

Time For a Rant!

I need to rant.

People can be so helpful when you go on a weight-loss journey. People can also be a big pain in the butt: That's why I've chosen not to tell certain people in my life that I have started Weight Watchers again.

My best friend, who lives three hours from me, is one person that I'm not telling.

She's on the low-carb kick. That's fine, it's her life, it works for her. I tried that once for two miserable weeks. Hated it, not for me. My DH likes it, too. When he needed to drop a few pounds, that's how he chose to do it.

My friend also is on a whole food kick. Nothing wrong with that at all! That's a good thing. However, she thinks that Americans need more fat in their diet. She says that low-fat diets don't work, and they're very bad for us.

I say that that people who say they eat low-fat don't do it on a consistent basis. I am the perfect example. When I cooked, everything was low fat. Yet I had no problem eating out a few times a week. I guarantee you my favorite Mexican restaurant, McDonald's, Taco Bell, Pizza Hut and Wendy's are not low-fat friendly: at least what I chose to eat there, they weren't. Thus it wiped my low-fat eating off the map.

She refuses to listen to my opinion. The fact of the matter is that there is scientific proof that low-fat diets do work, they can even reverse heart disease.

Said friend has also insisted that I get rid of every non-fat and low fat item in my kitchen, switch to whole milk, eat eggs on a daily basis. She says it's good for me.

I have tried to explain to her I can't eat those unhealthy fats. She quips back that they are not unhealthy. She even gets kind of nasty in a bully-ish way. Well, I have high triglycerides. I have proof that bad fats are bad for me. I made a switch to butter instead of margarine a couple years ago. Butter was "more pure" than margarine, so that's why I switched. What happened? My triglycerides went from 300 to 600. Just from butter, and not that much. I didn't change anything else.

So I stopped the butter, added a daily fish oil supplement, and my triglycerides went below 300. I am also on medication for the triglycerides now. I can't eat that unhealthy fat.

The only time any doctor has ever mentioned drinking whole milk was when I had my baby. His pediatrician said to have him on whole milk until age 2 as it helped with brain development. So he was on whole milk from age 1 to 1. We were then advised to go to 2%.

Okay, back to the friend. She also believes in food combining. No carbs with a meal, only proteins, etc. It's enough to make my head spin. She says there is new evidence to out there that calories have nothing to do with weight loss. She says eating certain foods will cause weight loss. Huh?

I give up. I just won't discuss it with her anymore. She doesn't get it. It's called Thermodynamics. And according to Weight Watchers,

"The only scientifically proven method for losing weight involves burning more
calories than you take in. 1 This is known as the law of thermodynamics. Yet
only 1/3 of Americans trying to lose weight try to do so by using the
recommended method of eating less and exercising more – the fundamental
foundation of weight loss. 1 2005 Dietary Guidelines Advisory
Committee Report."

Imagine that, lowering your caloric intake coupled with expending more energy than one consumes gives you weight loss. Go figure.

And here's where I get mean: She's fat. She's been on these weird eating regimes for years and years and she hasn't lost an ounce. (And I'm NOT saying low-carb is bad--it's healthy especially for diabetics, or rather I should say choosing healthy carbs is the way to go.) It's just all the nonsense she insists upon, like food combining, eating certain foods to lose weight, eating high-fat dairy product, coconut and palm oil. She has both oils in her cupboard, I've seen them.

There's no miracle. There's no miracle food, no get skinny quick pill that one can take (healthfully). It's all science, and it's called thermodynamics.

Eating whole foods is the way to go, but we still need to be mindful of calories. My grandpa used to eat all the fat on a piece of beef...that's a whole food, but not something I'll ever do.

Said friend gets so upset about her weight. I do, too. Yet I know that it centers around calories. I know that as this journey progresses, I will get away from processed foods and move toward healthier choices. I have begun that process. I know there's no easy answer. It's hard work, takes planning, and for me, it takes Weight Watchers. They know what they're doing.

There, rant over.