Yesterday hubby called me from work to inform me he had vacation to burn up, so he'd be taking today and all of next week off. He only gets Thanksgiving day. This was quite a shock.
When he's home, school suffers. He throws off our routine--it just doesn't work. So I told my son we'd do two subjects each day, including math today, Mon and Tues. The rest of the week we had planned to take of.
What was unexpected was the relief it gave me to know we were going to be slack. It was like a huge weight was lifted from my shoulders. It also gave me unexpected energy. Late yesterday afternoon and into the night, I started deep cleaning this kitchen with a vengeance. Everything moved, scrubbed, polished and sparkling. At supper, I refused to cook as I didn't want to mess up my work--I like to look at it for at least a half a day--and so we ate at Subway.
Today I've been doing things all around the house, worked out, catching up on laundry and relaxing. That relaxing is good for the soul.
Played Wii Fit with my son. When we got that a year ago, I hopped on in front of hubby and son and saw that weight shoot upto 280 and I could have died on the spot. Everyone saw the weight, the BMI and the stupid Mii blow up. I hated it ever since and never wanted anything to do with it. I suppose that was the holy sh*t moment for me, not realizing I had gained that much. I thought I was 260.
Anyway, my Wii age was 37--and I'm 44! I kicked butt on all the beginner strength moves. I played Wii step aerobics--easy, but it was beginner. I actually had fun. It took 55 pounds for me to get on it. I told my son we could play every night. No way would I count any of that as exercise, just counting it as fun. (Maybe the higher levels are more difficult?)
So it's going to be a great 10 days. Hubby home, light school, a chance for me to catch up and also relax.
What a lovely Thanksgiving it will be. And I am indeed very thankful!
11.20.2009
11.18.2009
Sore? Try this...
A foam roller.
I was reading blogs tonight and Shelley mentioned soreness. I totally forgot to mention my best trick to fight muscle soreness, or what I call DOMS.
I bought a foam roller at Target made by GoFit. I think it was under $20--it couldn't have been much more than that because I'm cheap. I bought this at the beginning of October.
It is a self-massage tool, it is a piece of heaven on earth. There are tons of videos on you tube on how to properly roll. You don't do your knees or your lower back. It's great for IT bands and everything else.
I roll every night before bed. I've learned it's not necessarily safe to do so in a night gown because I catch the gown and it rolls up. (Talk about exposure!) I also have to wear my hair in a ponytail before I roll, otherwise it will catch my hair.
This thing is fantastic. Where you're sore, you spend more time. You use your body weight and you actually engage your core while doing this. I would not be without my foam roller for anything. Gone are the days I beg for a back rub--I can give myself one.
There's some medical mumbo-jumo: it is used for myofascial release. Whatever--it works wonders with soreness.
Google it and check out the videos on You Tube. I absolutely love mine, and when I travel, it will go with me.
Doritos Casserole
I made Doritos Casserole for supper tonight. I've had this recipe a long time, but never made it because I didn't want to buy a bag of Doritos. Well, time for a change, so I tried it.
The original recipe did not call for refried beans, but we couldn't imagine the ingredients without, so I added a can.
The result: Really, really yummy. But, not a lot of food for the points. I was hungry after supper. It made six servings, so we'll have it again tomorrow night. I will plan ahead, so that I can have more calories for a side dish so I'm not so hungry.
The boys both asked this be added to our menus. I'm mixed--only because I was hungry. Flavor was great. Also, more processed foods than I'd like, but since we don't do that often, I won't worry too much.
This is really yummy served with shredded lettuce, fresh tomatoes and a dollop of light sour cream. (those items not included in recipe's nutritional info.)
* Exported for MasterCook 4 by Living Cookbook *
Doritos Casserole
Recipe By :
Serving Size : 6 Preparation Time:
Categories :
Amount Measure Ingredient -- Preparation Method
-------- ------------ --------------------------------
1 pound 93% ground beef
1/2 pound velveeta light
2 Tbsp chili powder
1 can FF chicken soup
1 can diced tomatoes
6 ounces baked doritos
1 can refried beans
1. Brown ground beef, add chili powder, cream of
chicken soup, and tomatoes. (I also added cumin and onion powder, and lots of both.)
Crush Doritos and pour half into a 9x13 casserole dish sprayed
with Pam, add a layer of the meat mixture, half the cheese, another layer
of chips, then meat mixture and finish off with cheese.
Bake at
350-degrees for 30 minutes.
(Used real Velveeta light, which was a pain to slice thinly, however it tasted very yummy.)
Nutrition (calculated from recipe ingredients)
----------------------------------------------
Calories: 433
Calories From Fat: 128
Total Fat: 14.5g
Cholesterol: 17.8mg
Sodium: 1138mg
Potassium: 554.6mg
Carbohydrates: 48.3g
Fiber: 7.6g
Sugar: 5.2g
Protein: 27g
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The original recipe did not call for refried beans, but we couldn't imagine the ingredients without, so I added a can.
The result: Really, really yummy. But, not a lot of food for the points. I was hungry after supper. It made six servings, so we'll have it again tomorrow night. I will plan ahead, so that I can have more calories for a side dish so I'm not so hungry.
The boys both asked this be added to our menus. I'm mixed--only because I was hungry. Flavor was great. Also, more processed foods than I'd like, but since we don't do that often, I won't worry too much.
This is really yummy served with shredded lettuce, fresh tomatoes and a dollop of light sour cream. (those items not included in recipe's nutritional info.)
* Exported for MasterCook 4 by Living Cookbook *
Doritos Casserole
Recipe By :
Serving Size : 6 Preparation Time:
Categories :
Amount Measure Ingredient -- Preparation Method
-------- ------------ --------------------------------
1 pound 93% ground beef
1/2 pound velveeta light
2 Tbsp chili powder
1 can FF chicken soup
1 can diced tomatoes
6 ounces baked doritos
1 can refried beans
1. Brown ground beef, add chili powder, cream of
chicken soup, and tomatoes. (I also added cumin and onion powder, and lots of both.)
Crush Doritos and pour half into a 9x13 casserole dish sprayed
with Pam, add a layer of the meat mixture, half the cheese, another layer
of chips, then meat mixture and finish off with cheese.
Bake at
350-degrees for 30 minutes.
(Used real Velveeta light, which was a pain to slice thinly, however it tasted very yummy.)
Nutrition (calculated from recipe ingredients)
----------------------------------------------
Calories: 433
Calories From Fat: 128
Total Fat: 14.5g
Cholesterol: 17.8mg
Sodium: 1138mg
Potassium: 554.6mg
Carbohydrates: 48.3g
Fiber: 7.6g
Sugar: 5.2g
Protein: 27g
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
A Pattern Emerges
In my mind, I'm seeing my life pattern. I've never noticed it before, but now it's becoming crystal clear.
I've never been a multi-tasker. In fact, I think I've written those words here many times before. I can do one, two or possibly three things well, and beyond that, I'm a mess.
I've gotten myself into a bit of a mess quite literally here lately. School is going really well, my food and exercise is going really well, but I feel like I'm a mess everywhere else.
Here's the pattern: When I get overwhelmed, which is the perfect word to describe it, I bury my head in the sand. It's too difficult for me to think beyond, to take action, to move because I let fear, overwhelm, and frustration immobilize me. This is exactly how I got to 282.5 to begin with. Certain things have always gone well in my life while others did not. And my own health was put on the back burner and into that place of doom for years. It was too overwhelming to think about it and to take action, so I buried my head in the sand.
I build up dread, I build up fear, I build up all this stinking thinking that multiplies quicker than rabbits. My mind plays tricks on me. When I don't bring to fruition what needs to be done, I guilt myself. This guilt takes away pleasure from other areas of my life. I do not feel deserving of good things because I have not accomplished X, Y and Z.
Now I know this comes from my upbringing. My mom was a wonderful lady, and I miss her dearly. She was a Type-A personality. She was spotless. She could teach Martha Stewart and the Flylady a thing or three. So was her mother. So I have very high standards to live up to. And I've always tried to live up to them. (I also believe that this Type-A personality, and her indefatigable spirit, led to her death at the age of 59.)
The difference in my life compared to them is that I did have a career for over a decade. Mom worked until I was born, but I've never experienced life with her when she worked. When I was working, I hired a cleaning lady which helped tremendously. Now I work, but without pay, and I'm always in the home. Running the home is my job. And the house gets messier because we're in it 24/7. We also have five animals. Granny had none, and mom had a dog, a dog that didn't shed. Five animals that shed brings an extraordinary amount of work that neither my mom or granny had to deal with. It also brings a lot of love that they lacked.
I compare myself to them, always fall short, and let it reflect on my self-esteem. I live to their standards, which I could only obtain if I lived alone or if I didn't homeschool or if I had fewer pets.
Okay, so I see the problem, I've defined it, I've thought it out. Coming up with solutions--difficult.
How easy it would be to say husband, you do X, Y and Z. Son, you do A, B and C. Husband doesn't, or else he does it on his terms. He cooks quite often, he will throw in a load of laundry, and he will pick something up but he will never do anything on a consistent basis. I can't change him, I can't tell him time and time again that I can't do it all, I need help because he doesn't hear. He does what he can. I am appreciative of his help when he gives it, but I know I cannot rely on his doing certain tasks at an appointed time. And frankly, he works a full-time job with a lot of unpaid overtime. He's tired. I've been in his shoes, which is why I hired a cleaning lady all those years ago.
My son helps out quite a bit. He needs to learn how to live. He usually isn't happy about it, but he does as he is asked. Sometimes he'll surprise me by doing something when he wasn't asked.
It comes down to me, and it really should because this is my job. I don't bring in an income, and I am home all day. Now homeschooling takes a lot of my time, but now that my son's concentration issues are getting much better, I could get up and do tasks when he's working on an assignment. I squander away a lot of my time sitting in front of a computer. I squander a lot of my time thinking about doing things rather than doing them. I make poor choices, and then guilt myself for not making better choices.
I need to figure out how to be a multi-tasker. I need to figure out how to lower my perfection standards, because I can't meet them. That's why I got fat, because if I couldn't eat perfectly or exercise perfectly, I might as well not try.
Perfection is a bad thing.
So I can't multi-task, I have extremely high standards, and I live in guilt. Not good.
I know what to do and how to do it. Maybe that's the worst part of it all, I do have the skills and knowledge. I just don't.
Life's too short to live like this. I've never seen the pattern, I've never labeled or identified it, even though I was aware of problems that I have. I have been working so hard at bettering myself, improving my health, and this is one big part of my health--mental health. Now that I've got the food and exercise on auto-pilot, I need to start pushing myself a little harder in other areas of my life. I can do that.
So I think this will be my next big focus, push until the end of the year. Wouldn't it be lovely to get some good routines worked out and have them on auto-pilot as well?
This whole journey is focused on getting myself better. When I fall into a rut, which I have in a lot of areas, I need to challenge myself to find what will work for me. I need to set my own standards. And that is what I will do. It's not just about exercising and food, it is much broader than that--it's becoming whole.
I've never been a multi-tasker. In fact, I think I've written those words here many times before. I can do one, two or possibly three things well, and beyond that, I'm a mess.
I've gotten myself into a bit of a mess quite literally here lately. School is going really well, my food and exercise is going really well, but I feel like I'm a mess everywhere else.
Here's the pattern: When I get overwhelmed, which is the perfect word to describe it, I bury my head in the sand. It's too difficult for me to think beyond, to take action, to move because I let fear, overwhelm, and frustration immobilize me. This is exactly how I got to 282.5 to begin with. Certain things have always gone well in my life while others did not. And my own health was put on the back burner and into that place of doom for years. It was too overwhelming to think about it and to take action, so I buried my head in the sand.
I build up dread, I build up fear, I build up all this stinking thinking that multiplies quicker than rabbits. My mind plays tricks on me. When I don't bring to fruition what needs to be done, I guilt myself. This guilt takes away pleasure from other areas of my life. I do not feel deserving of good things because I have not accomplished X, Y and Z.
Now I know this comes from my upbringing. My mom was a wonderful lady, and I miss her dearly. She was a Type-A personality. She was spotless. She could teach Martha Stewart and the Flylady a thing or three. So was her mother. So I have very high standards to live up to. And I've always tried to live up to them. (I also believe that this Type-A personality, and her indefatigable spirit, led to her death at the age of 59.)
The difference in my life compared to them is that I did have a career for over a decade. Mom worked until I was born, but I've never experienced life with her when she worked. When I was working, I hired a cleaning lady which helped tremendously. Now I work, but without pay, and I'm always in the home. Running the home is my job. And the house gets messier because we're in it 24/7. We also have five animals. Granny had none, and mom had a dog, a dog that didn't shed. Five animals that shed brings an extraordinary amount of work that neither my mom or granny had to deal with. It also brings a lot of love that they lacked.
I compare myself to them, always fall short, and let it reflect on my self-esteem. I live to their standards, which I could only obtain if I lived alone or if I didn't homeschool or if I had fewer pets.
Okay, so I see the problem, I've defined it, I've thought it out. Coming up with solutions--difficult.
How easy it would be to say husband, you do X, Y and Z. Son, you do A, B and C. Husband doesn't, or else he does it on his terms. He cooks quite often, he will throw in a load of laundry, and he will pick something up but he will never do anything on a consistent basis. I can't change him, I can't tell him time and time again that I can't do it all, I need help because he doesn't hear. He does what he can. I am appreciative of his help when he gives it, but I know I cannot rely on his doing certain tasks at an appointed time. And frankly, he works a full-time job with a lot of unpaid overtime. He's tired. I've been in his shoes, which is why I hired a cleaning lady all those years ago.
My son helps out quite a bit. He needs to learn how to live. He usually isn't happy about it, but he does as he is asked. Sometimes he'll surprise me by doing something when he wasn't asked.
It comes down to me, and it really should because this is my job. I don't bring in an income, and I am home all day. Now homeschooling takes a lot of my time, but now that my son's concentration issues are getting much better, I could get up and do tasks when he's working on an assignment. I squander away a lot of my time sitting in front of a computer. I squander a lot of my time thinking about doing things rather than doing them. I make poor choices, and then guilt myself for not making better choices.
I need to figure out how to be a multi-tasker. I need to figure out how to lower my perfection standards, because I can't meet them. That's why I got fat, because if I couldn't eat perfectly or exercise perfectly, I might as well not try.
Perfection is a bad thing.
So I can't multi-task, I have extremely high standards, and I live in guilt. Not good.
I know what to do and how to do it. Maybe that's the worst part of it all, I do have the skills and knowledge. I just don't.
Life's too short to live like this. I've never seen the pattern, I've never labeled or identified it, even though I was aware of problems that I have. I have been working so hard at bettering myself, improving my health, and this is one big part of my health--mental health. Now that I've got the food and exercise on auto-pilot, I need to start pushing myself a little harder in other areas of my life. I can do that.
So I think this will be my next big focus, push until the end of the year. Wouldn't it be lovely to get some good routines worked out and have them on auto-pilot as well?
This whole journey is focused on getting myself better. When I fall into a rut, which I have in a lot of areas, I need to challenge myself to find what will work for me. I need to set my own standards. And that is what I will do. It's not just about exercising and food, it is much broader than that--it's becoming whole.
11.17.2009
Fatigue
I am tired.
I am overwhelmed.
Daily life is getting in my way.
School is going very well.
Exercise/food is going very well.
Everything else? Falling to pieces.
Will blog tomorrow about my feelings -- I've been thinking a lot about this and see a pattern in my life. Need to figure out how to get organized, with it, and doing my daily tasks better.
I am tired. Going to bed now.
I am overwhelmed.
Daily life is getting in my way.
School is going very well.
Exercise/food is going very well.
Everything else? Falling to pieces.
Will blog tomorrow about my feelings -- I've been thinking a lot about this and see a pattern in my life. Need to figure out how to get organized, with it, and doing my daily tasks better.
I am tired. Going to bed now.
Shelley Rocks!
I'm Johni come lately tonight, as I've been busy all day. Still wide awake, I decided to hit up blogs. First up (and probably last as I'm getting tired) was Shelley's.
I get very emotional, and when I read her blog title and then the entry, I actually teared up. Yes, I actually have tears of joy for her rolling down my cheeks.
Now I'm sure everyone already knows this as Shelley is one cool, super-supportive, kind and wonderful blogger. Woman's Day affirms my belief, as Shelley is mentioned in their upcoming issue.
All I can say is it couldn't have happened to a more lovely person.
Way to go, Shelley. I am beyond happy for you!
Shelley's blog
I get very emotional, and when I read her blog title and then the entry, I actually teared up. Yes, I actually have tears of joy for her rolling down my cheeks.
Shelley has lost 100 pounds.
Now I'm sure everyone already knows this as Shelley is one cool, super-supportive, kind and wonderful blogger. Woman's Day affirms my belief, as Shelley is mentioned in their upcoming issue.
All I can say is it couldn't have happened to a more lovely person.
Way to go, Shelley. I am beyond happy for you!
Shelley's blog
11.16.2009
Thrift Store Finds
Today my son had an orthodontist appointment in the big city. When we go up there, we usually hit three or four thrift stores. I'm looking for exercise stuff, he's looking for games. We both usually come home empty handed.
One time, I found the cutest blow mold pumpkin for $1.50. When I googled it, I discovered people collect these things and it was worth anywhere from 15-30 bucks! Score. I just liked it because it was cute. Blow molds are the plastic figures anywhere from a foot tall to life-size with lights inside. We washed it up, and he sat on our kitchen counter all of October. On Halloween, I put him outside.
I was hoping to find a blow mold Santa for Christmas. This past weekend, I hit our local thrift stores and came home empty handed. Today, though, the first store we came to there were two, foot-tall Santas. I snapped them both up at $1 each. The old electrical cords went in the garbage to be replaced by safe cords. I just need to wash them up. One will go outside for the season, and the nicer will sit on our counter.
It's the little things in life that make me happy. I'm all about vintage, and these were made in the 60s, and I love them. =)
Also purchased were three exercise videos. A Karen Voight, a TamiLee Webb and a Gilad Step and Tone. At 50 cents apiece, if I hate 'em, I can re-donate them. I think it's good to check out new instructors and styles.
Since these things are VHS, I couldn't run to the living room and put them in as the boys were in there. So with my computer in the kitchen, and me cooking dinner, I found bits of Gilad's Step and Tone on YouTube and played it. All of a sudden I heard howling laughter from the living room and the boys demanded to know what that noise was. lol Yes, it was kind of funny, even by my standards.
Thing is, I really liked it. Nice, easy step work where I won't trip over myself, and he uses weights while doing his step work. Um, that's what the FIRM does, they call it four-limb cardio. So I think once I get a chance to view the whole tape, I'll enjoy it.
Haven't taken a look at the other two. They're abs tapes, and I hate working on abs. lol That which we hate is usually that which we need to work the most on!
I also received a FitPrime tape in the mail from Donna--thank you! FitPrime was Anna Benson's next venture after she sold The FIRM. I am anxious to do Metaboost this week.
Today I didn't work out. In the car two hours, walking, hopping in and out of the car, doing some shopping besides the thrift stores, rushing to get school done--we made a good stab at it before we left, coming home starved and having to cook supper...I'm just too worn out. I took a rest day yesterday, too.
I'm just about over this silly virus. I'm at the really tired stage. Yesterday I got *nothing* done except a 3-hour nap, and today was on the go, but I have nothing but a cute Santa and cheap VHS tapes to show for it. Oh, yeah, my kiddo's bright, smiling face. He looks cute with green braces.
I also checked out the one and only Jari Love tape from our library, Get Ripped. I like The FIRM much better. Hers is good, though. I hear great things about her Get Extremely Ripped 1000.
I'm going to put my jammies on and hope that time goes fast so that I can just go to bed. If I lie down now, I'll wake up and be up in the night. So I'm hoping by 9 that I can crawl into bed.
One time, I found the cutest blow mold pumpkin for $1.50. When I googled it, I discovered people collect these things and it was worth anywhere from 15-30 bucks! Score. I just liked it because it was cute. Blow molds are the plastic figures anywhere from a foot tall to life-size with lights inside. We washed it up, and he sat on our kitchen counter all of October. On Halloween, I put him outside.
I was hoping to find a blow mold Santa for Christmas. This past weekend, I hit our local thrift stores and came home empty handed. Today, though, the first store we came to there were two, foot-tall Santas. I snapped them both up at $1 each. The old electrical cords went in the garbage to be replaced by safe cords. I just need to wash them up. One will go outside for the season, and the nicer will sit on our counter.
It's the little things in life that make me happy. I'm all about vintage, and these were made in the 60s, and I love them. =)
Also purchased were three exercise videos. A Karen Voight, a TamiLee Webb and a Gilad Step and Tone. At 50 cents apiece, if I hate 'em, I can re-donate them. I think it's good to check out new instructors and styles.
Since these things are VHS, I couldn't run to the living room and put them in as the boys were in there. So with my computer in the kitchen, and me cooking dinner, I found bits of Gilad's Step and Tone on YouTube and played it. All of a sudden I heard howling laughter from the living room and the boys demanded to know what that noise was. lol Yes, it was kind of funny, even by my standards.
Thing is, I really liked it. Nice, easy step work where I won't trip over myself, and he uses weights while doing his step work. Um, that's what the FIRM does, they call it four-limb cardio. So I think once I get a chance to view the whole tape, I'll enjoy it.
Haven't taken a look at the other two. They're abs tapes, and I hate working on abs. lol That which we hate is usually that which we need to work the most on!
I also received a FitPrime tape in the mail from Donna--thank you! FitPrime was Anna Benson's next venture after she sold The FIRM. I am anxious to do Metaboost this week.
Today I didn't work out. In the car two hours, walking, hopping in and out of the car, doing some shopping besides the thrift stores, rushing to get school done--we made a good stab at it before we left, coming home starved and having to cook supper...I'm just too worn out. I took a rest day yesterday, too.
I'm just about over this silly virus. I'm at the really tired stage. Yesterday I got *nothing* done except a 3-hour nap, and today was on the go, but I have nothing but a cute Santa and cheap VHS tapes to show for it. Oh, yeah, my kiddo's bright, smiling face. He looks cute with green braces.
I also checked out the one and only Jari Love tape from our library, Get Ripped. I like The FIRM much better. Hers is good, though. I hear great things about her Get Extremely Ripped 1000.
I'm going to put my jammies on and hope that time goes fast so that I can just go to bed. If I lie down now, I'll wake up and be up in the night. So I'm hoping by 9 that I can crawl into bed.
Monday Morning Weigh In
Well, for the third week in a row...
227
I'm okay with it this morning. Not gonna whine.
I weigh everything, I exercise even when I'm sick, I am doing everything I can. I am seeing fat loss on my body--both hubs and I have noticed a few spots just from last week that are smaller.
So, it's just a number.
What I find interesting is even though I am shrinking (granted, it's not a lot, but it is noticeable to us), why doesn't the scale show it? Hubby says I'm gaining muscle. Yet I can't gain that much muscle.
I'm just not going to worry about this anymore, though. I'm just going to keep at it, as I have not cheated and don't plan on it, and soon the number will drop.
I'm getting healthier, gaining strength and fitness, and that's what counts.
I almost didn't even bother to blog this, but I'm always honest about things, so here it is.
227
I'm okay with it this morning. Not gonna whine.
I weigh everything, I exercise even when I'm sick, I am doing everything I can. I am seeing fat loss on my body--both hubs and I have noticed a few spots just from last week that are smaller.
So, it's just a number.
What I find interesting is even though I am shrinking (granted, it's not a lot, but it is noticeable to us), why doesn't the scale show it? Hubby says I'm gaining muscle. Yet I can't gain that much muscle.
I'm just not going to worry about this anymore, though. I'm just going to keep at it, as I have not cheated and don't plan on it, and soon the number will drop.
I'm getting healthier, gaining strength and fitness, and that's what counts.
I almost didn't even bother to blog this, but I'm always honest about things, so here it is.
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