In the Wee Hours

It's nearly 2 in the morning. Here I am wide awake.

The good news today: I didn't take a single pain pill. No motrin, no vicodin. YAY That doesn't mean I was pain free, because I was not. It just means the pain was tolerable and light.

Every single moment I can feel my kidney, the tube in the ureter, and where the tube ends. I still am not used to it, it still creeps me out, and it's still uncomfortable to painful. It comes out next week--hopefully. I have to have an X-ray first, then if that looks good, out it comes.

I had a very bad night Monday. I did a little walking and felt fine after. It boosted my spirits so much. Then toward midnight, I had moderate to high-moderate pain. I had to take Vicodin. I was up all night long, couldn't get comfortable, and was pretty miserable. DH woke up and we had coffee together, which is a rare occurrence. I took Vicodin the whole day Tuesday and did nothing. My step count was under 4000 which is super low for me. Those steps were mostly walking to the bathroom or to the kitchen to get something to drink.

I slept well that night and today? SO much better. Again, I did nothing. Laid in bed, got online for a few minutes, walked to the kitchen and bathroom.

So the key is: Do nothing, I guess.

I am weak, tired, puffy, bloated and fat. I just feel and look toxic. My right leg is very swollen. When I put socks on, the right side had a dent in it. So uncool. My weight is up. That is so frustrating. It's not going back down. So I guess I have to swallow my pride and start fresh once this thing comes out of me. I hate having to re-lose pounds I've already lost, especially since I have been such a slow loser. However, I'd rather re-lose than continue to gain.

I miss working out more than anything. This sedentary lifestyle is for the birds. I want to move, to breathe, to work out...Soon.

Right now I just want the &*(#$ing tube out of me.

This stent business has been much more miserable than I ever imagined. I think it's going to take me awhile to gain back my strength.

I haven't read my last few blog posts over, but my gut is telling me I write the same thing over and over. Mostly I'm writing for myself so I'll remember. What's to remember? This is torture, hell and icky. But today was a big day, no pain meds, and for that I am so happy. May tomorrow be the same.

Hurry up and get here, appointment, so I can heal and get on with life.