My First 5K--I DID IT!

Dang it! How do I rotate this in the new format?  YIKES...I've lost all blogging abilities!

Here I am at the finish line.

Time: 42:16
Hope: 45  My best in training was 48 minutes.  I beat my HOPE time! WOOT

Did not enjoy it during the race, was grumpy--some people were kind of rude, and I kept thinking that I could do this at home for free and not pay gas money, entry money, etc.  When I saw that time at the finish line, that changed my mind.  I didn't cry until I started walking to my car and then it hit...the tears just poured.

ME--282.5 pound former me--I wogged (jogged/walked) a 5K.

This is the first of many...

HELL YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!

Like Me on Facebook!

I spend more time on Facebook than I do in the blog world.  I decided since I do that, I would do a like page. I will update there more than here. So feel free to like me! It's a work in progress, I am just learning the ropes of like pages, but just thought I'd share!

Get Tough 282.5

Come like me!  :-)


Thanks!

Me...

Size 12, 178 pounds May 2012 (The t-shirt is a size large)

Size 24 282.5 pounds February 2009

SIze 12 and a 5K

I am sitting here crying--tears of joy.  I went shopping tonight. I pulled size 14 shorts and capris. All were too big. Every last pair.  I am now officially in a size 12.  Tops I pulled XlG. Too big. I am officially in a large. Plus, I bought one medium top that fits.  In a uni-sex t-shirt, I wear a size medium.

Here is a quote from my goal page:

Clothing-size goals:

(going by pant size here) (the last time I lost, it took a long time before I dropped clothing size.)
22-24 starting size20 August -0918 Some size 18s in August 0916 1-17-1014 11-7-11!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Being below a size 14 is incomprehensible to me today. Will update when I get there.The above was my original post. Now being below a 14 is NOT incomprehensible to me, it is something I WILL experience. Will update size changes as they occur here!

Notice I said below a size 14 is incomprehensible? Now it is surreal, it is unbelievable and amazing. I did it. I AM below that size 14.  I'm not done, I still have pudge, I have wings on my arms and will probably never be able to go sleeveless, but by golly, size 12.  And I will be smaller. 

And now for the other news. I am training for a 5K.  I am in my sixth week doing the Ease into 5K program. It's basically the same as couch to 5K.  I am running.  So far I have run 10 minutes in one pop. Tomorrow's run has me a bit nervous, it's 20 minutes straight. I'm slower than molasses, I'm not graceful, but I AM RUNNING.  

PINCH ME...I just cannot believe the difference between February 2009 and today.  DREAM DO COME TRUE, they just take hard work, perseverance, blood, sweat and tears plus time.

BELIEVE IN YOURSELF

We can do anything!!!

Chaos Central

It's been too long since I blogged.

I've been in a lot of emotional pain. Depression really bad again.  I went to the doctor, tried another anti-depressant and he said he wanted me to see a therapist.  Grrrrrrr.  I'd gone to a few counselors in the past and it was a waste of time. However, I was hurting SO bad I went last week.

Diagnosos:  PSTD, post traumatic stress disorder and Acute Stress Disorder.  Three people involved, but one did the extreme damage.

Lovely.  I think that's why my weight loss stopped. I got to a point that I all those layers had shed away and I was exposed. It was time to figure out WHY I got that way to begin with.  Things happen for a reason, and while this depression SUCKS, it's for the better because I am getting help now.

PTSD is pretty serious, and it explains my sleep issues, my fear issues, my lack of confidence, my--well, almost everything. Life changed a few years ago and it's time to get better and take it back. I've done the work for the physical part, I still have some left to go, but I've lots over 100 pounds and improved my fitness. Now it's time to take care of the inside.

Speaking of physical, I'm teaching myself to run.  I have a 5K I want to do in July. I am terrible at running, I don't know if I'm going to be able to run the 5K or not.  I just do my best.  Never ever thought I'd do that, but it's for some people I met recently who lost their son in the war and I love them to pieces and it means a lot for me to do this.  So in his name, Jon, I will give it my all.

It's March

For someone who suffers from seasonal depression, March is one of the greatest things. It means warm temps on the way, it means spring, it means sunshine, it means relief!

I'm feeling better. I'm not 100%, but I feel it lifting. I'm getting more productive. I'm getting there.

I had recently tried to do a Kick Ass Challenge. The depression was too much and it was not the right time. I just recently joined a challenge that supports our military and is raising money to fight PTSD. Huge incentive for me, I want to help our brave warriors who give so much. So I'm feeling VERY fired up.

The game plan:

The Skogg System

I had SO MUCH success with this program this past fall, it's time to do another rotation! I will also do a few of the weight machines at the gym and will do cardio there, too.

Exciting news for me: At the gym the other night, I was surrounded by people jogging and I got a little competitive. I upped the pace on the treadmill and DID IT. I jogged 2 minutes, then slowed it down and walked 2 minutes. I did this off and on for a half hour. WOW Never ever thought I could. I had two mantras during to keep me going: I can do anything for a minute. When that minute was up, I switched to CRUSH IT.

So I'm fired up, it's spring, and it's time to get the ball rolling!!!

Let's all crush it!

Health

Sometimes taking care of your health involves more than counting calories and worrying about losing weight.

This SAD has been awful and I did start taking an antidepressant. It has "kicked in" and put me in a very groggy state. I'm playing around now with timing of taking the medication. I have also cut the pill in half, which helped for a bit. I had a bad wave of depression hit me tonight, so I took a full pill again.

I want so badly to get the last 30ish pounds off. Right now I'm holding steady at 175, which is okay. Right now the focus is to get the chemicals in my brain balanced.

My journey has always been about health. Right now the SAD takes priority.

That said, it's important to keep working out. I've been keeping up with my walking. Sometimes I go to the gym, sometimes I work out at home. It's funny, I joined the gym to be around people and get out of my comfort zone. That has happened. It's nice to smile at people, chat in the dressing room, and have a bit of small talk while on a machine. However, there aren't always people around when I work out. It can be very lonely. I do get a better strength workout at the gym than what I do at home because there is more equipment. That said, working out at home to DVDs is great, too. I like the cardio better. I like the fact that I'm not alone--there are people doing the same thing with me, even though they're on film. LOL

The two together are a nice mix. Balance.

In other news, my husband and I were invited to test for our first stripe in karate. That will happen in about two weeks. I've come a long way, baby. When I started this blog three years ago, I never would have dreamed I'd be in karate. I love it. It's hard, it's out of my comfort zone, it's very foreign. Yet here I am, learning, meeting new people, and succeeding.

It's amazing how life has changed in the past three years.