Happy July

Oh, a brand new month, time to wipe the slate clean and start fresh.

I have chosen to not let anxiety bother me today. Ahem. lol So far so good.

Last night, even though I was a tad shaky, I forced myself to go out of the box. At 8:30 I told my son to put his shoes on, we were going to a movie. I don't typically go to movies--too expensive. I needed to challenge myself to do it, though. I made it through the dentist appointment, I knew I needed to continue to push. So we went to see Up. Loved it! I actually had tears running down my cheeks twice. Great movie for any age. My anxiety came with me to the movie, and I sat and practiced breathing, holding it in, exhaling. Pretty soon it was gone as I escaped into the movie.

I ate one of my son's Butterfinger bites that he bought. When we could see the nutritional info on the box, I was horrified to learn that 1 of those bites was 1 point. Egads. It was good, but not that good. Surprisingly, I did not miss stuffing my face with popcorn.

Today is going to be a slow, relaxing day. I have lots of things to do around the house. Instead of making a list that will overwhelm me, I'm going to do it as I see it. I can get a great deal of work accomplished doing this. It's sort of like the book If You Give a Mouse a Cookie, but at the end of the day I usually have a lot to show for my effort.

Tomorrow my son and I have a fun day planned. We're going to take a short train ride. After that, I have three full days that I don't have to go anywhere. We are not doing anything special for the 4th other than going to fireworks. Hubby has Friday off, so it will be nice to have my rock around for three solid days.

Looking back at the month of June, and specifically at my exercise calendar, I do not like what I see. Not one little bit. Much of June I was plagued by pain, a lot of pain, but not the entire month. So I am going to challenge myself to exercise 16 days straight until my surgery. I don't know how long I'll have to take off after that, but I can and should work out before. Every little bit helps, and I want to be strong for that. And for life, for me.

I have also not done my regular grocery shopping/menu planning for this week. Shoot, it's only Wednesday. lol We're pretty well stocked, but I'm about out of salad so it's time to get that task done.

One final comment. UGLY. It's an ugly word. If someone were to ask me point blank if I thought I was ugly, I would answer no. I am not ugly. However, I'm very real, and I know that I can be ugly. Dressing in clothes too big or ill-fitting, not fixing myself up, etc., that makes me look ugly. My glasses make me look ugly. There's a fine line, and I know the difference. I guess I'm trying to say I am not dissing on myself at all, I'm just reality based. I know when I look ugly. Like first thing in the morning...that's not a pretty sight! And the great thing about realizing all of this: it's easy to change. A couple well-fitting outfits for when I'm out and about, taking five minutes on my hair as opposed to letting it air dry, etc. Makes all the difference in the world.

So no, I am not ugly.

I'm happy to report that I have met JackSh*t's challenge! As I told him in my email: I did it! I met your challenge. Victory is mine, all mine. =) This challenge met, now to conquer the world, and I WILL conquer the world! (Said in Stewie Griffin style.)