.9 whine

This morning my sister emailed me. She asked me how WW was going. She then told me she lost a whopping 1/4 pound last night at tops. She told me to lose weight now, because as you get older, it is a lot harder. She is 54, 10 years older than me.

I wrote back and told her that I am already feeling the age.

This past weekend I spent a lot of time going over my journals, reading all the program books I have starting with 1-2-3. I re-worked some of my recipes to check points. I re-calculated my points in my journal. Everything was spot on. This weekend WW told me my average weight loss per week was 1.2 pounds.

Monday, with my whopping .5 loss, my average dropped. I am losing .9 per week.

I'm not giving up, I'm persevering, and if it takes forever and a day, so be it. But damn it all, WHY? Why am I eating at target and not losing a little better? Exercise may or may not be a factor. I run through spurts. It is kind of pain dependent for me.

I look back to when I did WW 7 year ago, and I checked those journals. Yes, I kept them. Aside from the fact I'm better with fruits and veggies today, I ate pretty much the same way. I had fantastic losses then. I did not exercise consistently then at all. I mean once every couple weeks. I don't know the average because I was going to meetings, but I lost 72 pounds in 8 months.

What gives?

I like WW online. I like it a lot. I don't have to go out of my comfort zone and sit by myself at the clicky WW meetings. I do miss the leader, as I really liked her. Again, I also knew her through Cub Scouts--I met some great people in Scouts.

If I were going to meetings, I think I would arrive early and sit and visit with her about this. If the average loss is 1-2 pounds a week, I'm no longer hitting average. And the thing that sucks is that aside from my birthday, I am on plan.

I am now 44. That could be a factor. I have been under an extreme amount of stress, which is lifting, but last year about did me in. I am now taking Tricor for triglycerides, and I wasn't then even though my triglycerides were high then. I am faithful with vitamins now, then I wasn't. I do have all these pain issues that I've tried not to whine about too much in the last couple weeks, but they're still with me. Hopefully that will be taken care of on Friday.

I just can't figure it out. Now my attitude is this is for health. Then it was a diet, I'd lose, and then eat normally. (Which made me gain it all back plus some.) Now I know that this is for life--with the goal of getting my food healthier as I go along.

I am really perplexed. A couple of week I went back to Winning Points. That's the program I did where I lost all my weight. I can't even make up my mind if I want to do WP, use flex points, or do Momentum.

I think I may be making this harder than it has to be. ? I don't know. All I know is that I am a bit frustrated. If I were cheating, it wouldn't bother me, but I'm not.

My husband's only thought is that due to age, I have lost muscle mass. Yet, even though I'm not lifting, I can really feel my muscles building in my arms and legs. They're firming up. I think that's due to Richard Simmons' videos.

I wrote to my sister that no matter how small the losses, I'm sticking with it and so should she. I was sad to learn she's on insulin now. That was motivating to me because I don't want that. Two siblings with diabetes, both parents had it--my biggest goal has been in avoiding it. So far so good.

.9 It's better than maintaining, it's better than gaining, and it is moving in the right direction. That doesn't mean I have to like that average number, because I don't. But thank God it is going in the right direction.

Whine over.

Jo, who is clueless